Coach Lee

Your Ex Tests You Without Knowing It

Body

$7 Reunion Blueprint at https://ReunionBlueprint.com You think they’ve moved on. They’re silent. Distant. Maybe even cold. But behind that silence, something else is happening—and they don’t even realize it. In this video, I’ll reveal five hidden ways your ex is subconsciously testing you after the breakup. Not because they’re playing games… But because they’re trying to protect their pride, their narrative, and the version of the story that makes them feel right. And every time you don’t react the way they expect you to— you shake their certainty a little more. Here’s what you’ll learn: 💔 Why your ex is watching to see if you’ll fall apart without them 💔 How your silence quietly challenges the story they’ve told themselves about the breakup 💔 The real reason they’re hoping you’ll reset the dynamic first 💔 Why distance is forcing their old feelings to resurface—whether they want that or not 💔 The subtle way they’re testing if they still live rent-free in your mind The truth is: They’re testing you. But you? You’re passing in silence. $7 Reunion Blueprint at https://ReunionBlueprint.com

The Struggle Your Ex Hides

Your ex might seem calm, distant, or completely fine after the breakup.

Get Coach Lee's Reunion Blueprint at https://ReunionBlueprint.com.

Book a coaching session with Coach Lee at https://myexbackcoach.com/book-with-coach-lee/

Maybe they’re silent. Maybe they’re posting like life has never been better.

Maybe they’ve even convinced themselves that they’re at peace.

But here’s the truth—they’re struggling more than they’ll ever admit. Breakups don’t bring instant clarity.

They create doubt, emotional contradictions, and hidden struggles that most people refuse to acknowledge.

While you’re wondering if they’ve moved on without a second thought, they’re fighting an internal battle they don’t want you to see.

In this episode, I’ll break down five hidden struggles your ex is facing right now—whether they show it or not: 🎙️ What You’ll Learn in This Episode: They’re Exhausted from Pretending They Don’t Care – The silent emotional drain of keeping up an act. They Can’t Escape the “What If?” Thoughts – How doubt slowly replaces their initial confidence.

Seeing You Unaffected Makes Their Internal Struggle Worse – Why their need for control backfires.

They’re Afraid to Admit They Might Have Been Wrong – How their ego is keeping them stuck.

Their Silence Isn’t Peace—It’s a Battle – The hidden emotional chaos they can’t avoid forever. If you think their silence means they don’t care, you’re only seeing the surface. The longer they stay silent, the harder this struggle becomes.

Get Coach Lee's Reunion Blueprint at https://ReunionBlueprint.com.

Book a coaching session with Coach Lee at https://myexbackcoach.com/book-with-coach-lee/

Your Ex Is More Confused Than You Think

Right now, it might seem like your ex is completely certain about their decision. They’re acting distant, cold, and unbothered—like you never really mattered to them. But here’s the truth… they’re more confused than you think.

Get Coach Lee's "Reunion Blueprint" for just $7 at https://ReunionBlueprint.com

Book a private session with Coach Lee at https://myexbackcoach.com/book-with-coach-lee/

Breakups don’t bring instant clarity. Instead, they create doubt, second-guessing, and emotional contradictions that your ex may not even recognize yet. In this episode, I’ll break down five psychological reasons why your ex isn’t as sure as they seem—and why their silence, avoidance, or even their confidence might actually be a sign of confusion.

What You’ll Learn in This Episode:
Why confusion often looks like rejection—and how to avoid taking it personally.
The reason your ex thought they’d feel better by now… but don’t.
How they’re caught between missing you and proving a point—and why that keeps them stuck.
The hidden self-doubt they don’t want to admit (even to themselves).
Why your certainty makes them even more confused.
Your ex’s mind isn’t as made up as you think. And the moment they realize that? Everything changes.

Get Coach Lee's "Reunion Blueprint" for just $7 at https://ReunionBlueprint.com

Book a private session with Coach Lee at https://myexbackcoach.com/book-with-coach-lee/

Why Your Ex Feels Nothing...YET

Your ex may seem unaffected by the breakup, but that’s likely not the full story. There are several reasons why they appear to feel nothing—at least, for now.

Get Coach Lee's $7 "Reunion Blueprint" at https://ReunionBlueprint.com. 

If you are in a troubled marriage, get Coach Lee's FREE mini-course on saving your marriage at https://MarriageRadio.com/marriagehelp 

1. Dopamine and the Relief Stage

When your ex decided to break up, their brain rewarded them with dopamine, the same chemical that gives a sense of satisfaction when completing difficult tasks. Since breaking up is tough, their brain gives them a sense of relief, making them feel like they’ve “escaped” something they had been struggling with for a while. Even if they later regret the breakup, at the moment, they feel good because the breakup is no longer something they are dreading. This initial relief can make it seem like they feel nothing, but it's just the temporary high of crossing a difficult task off their mental to-do list.

2. No Emotional Consequences Yet

Your ex has not yet had time to fully experience your absence. The human brain assumes that familiar people will always be around, so in the early stages after a breakup, they don’t feel like they’ve lost you permanently. If you keep reaching out, they won’t feel any real emotional consequences. They won’t miss you because they still believe you are an option. In order for them to feel your absence, you must stop contacting them and allow reality to set in.

3. They Consider You a Perpetual Option

If your ex hasn’t experienced you truly being gone, they don’t believe they’ve lost you. Many people make the mistake of keeping communication open, thinking it will help rebuild the relationship, but in reality, it only reinforces the breakup. By remaining in their life, you make it easier for them to move on, because nothing feels different. The best way to make them reconsider is to actually walk away and let them realize what life is like without you.

4. They Are Rewriting the Relationship

To justify the breakup, your ex may distort their memories of the relationship, making you seem worse than you were. They may label you as toxic, controlling, or even call you a narcissist, not necessarily because they believe it, but because they need a logical reason to explain the breakup to themselves and others. However, over time, their brain will naturally forget the negatives and remember the positives more clearly. This psychological process, known as the fading effect bias, often leads people to regret their decisions.

5. They Feel Something, But They Won’t Show It

Your ex may be feeling emotions but doesn’t want to admit it. Reaching out after a breakup can feel embarrassing, so instead, they look for an excuse to reconnect subtly. They may start small, sending a casual message, hoping you’ll take the lead. Some people struggle with accountability and want the other person to be the one to initiate getting back together.

Final Thoughts

The best way to handle this situation is to stay away. Let your ex go through the natural stages of post-breakup emotions. As the dopamine fades and they experience your absence, they may start to miss you. If you continue to reach out, you only delay this process. Instead, give them the breakup they wanted—so they can truly feel what life is like without you. 

 Get Coach Lee's $7 "Reunion Blueprint" at https://ReunionBlueprint.com. 

If you are in a troubled marriage, get Coach Lee's FREE mini-course on saving your marriage at https://MarriageRadio.com/marriagehelp 

Pain Your Ex Feels But Won't ADMIT

Your ex may act fine after the breakup, but deep down, they’re feeling emotions they won’t admit to anyone—including themselves. In this podcast episode, Coach Lee reveals the hidden pain your ex experiences as time passes and why they might start to regret leaving you.

What You’ll Learn in This Episode:

• The Pain of Uncertainty: Why they start questioning if breaking up was a mistake.

• The Emotional Crash: How their initial relief turns into emptiness.

• The Power of Nostalgia: Why their brain rewrites history to focus on the good times.

• The Reality of Feeling Stuck: How seeing you move forward makes them feel left behind.

• The Shock of Your Silence: Why they expected you to chase—but now wonder if they lost you forever.

Why This Matters

Your ex’s silence doesn’t mean they’re happy. Their ego, fear, and pride keep them from showing their true emotions. But as time passes, their pain grows—until they can no longer ignore it. Understanding this process can help you stay strong in no contact and give you the best chance of making them realize what they lost.

📌 Want a step-by-step plan to get your ex back? Get the $7 Reunion Blueprint at ReunionBlueprint.com 📌 For more expert breakup coaching, visit: MyExBackCoach.com.

If you are married, visit https://MarriageRadio.com. 

💬 Have you noticed your ex showing signs of hidden pain? Share your experience in the comments below! Don’t forget to subscribe to the podcast for more insights from Coach Lee.

Your Ex Feels Worse Over Time

At first, it might seem like your ex is doing just fine after the breakup—maybe even relieved. But that feeling won’t last forever. In this episode, Coach Lee dives deep into why your ex actually feels worse as time goes on and how their emotions shift in ways they never expected.

What You’ll Learn in This Episode:

• Why your ex’s emotions are delayed after the breakup – Understanding the psychological timeline that makes them feel worse over time.

• How nostalgia rewrites the past – Why your ex starts remembering the good times more than the bad as weeks and months pass.

• The role of no contact in amplifying their regret – How staying silent makes them realize what they’ve lost.

• Why their emotional safety net disappears – The hidden reason why breakups often hit dumpers harder later.

• Signs they may be struggling behind the scenes – Subtle behaviors that reveal they’re not as fine as they pretend to be.

Time is on your side. Your ex might have felt in control initially, but as time passes, the weight of their decision sinks in. The longer the silence lasts, the more their mind starts questioning, doubting, and missing you.

📌 For expert breakup guidance and step-by-step strategies, visit: MyExBackCoach.com
📌 Get the $7 Reunion Blueprint to maximize your chances of getting them back: ReunionBlueprint.com

If you are experiencing a marriage crisis, get Coach Lee's free mini-course on saving a marriage at https://MarriageRadio.com/marriagehelp 

💬 Have you seen an ex struggle months after the breakup? Share your experience in the comments! Don’t forget to subscribe to the podcast for more relationship insights from Coach Lee.

 

Radio Silence To Get An Ex Back

The Impact of Radio Silence on Your Ex

Radio silence is one of the most effective strategies after a breakup, particularly if your ex was the one who ended the relationship. It works hand in hand with no contact but has its own unique impact. By removing yourself from your ex’s life completely—no texting, no social media updates, no interaction—you create a noticeable absence that forces them to feel the consequences of their decision.

Get Coach Lee's Reunion Blueprint to get your ex back for only $7 at https://ReunionBlueprint.com. 

Breaking the Seek-and-Find Pattern

In today’s world, we’re used to getting answers instantly. If we have a question, we Google it. If we need to know something, we check social media or text someone. But when it comes to people, things work differently.

When you go silent, your ex loses the ability to check up on you. They can’t find out how you're doing, who you’re with, or whether you’ve moved on. That can be incredibly frustrating for them because it breaks their expectation that they can always seek information and find it.

This is an important first consequence of the breakup—they no longer have access to you. Before, they were used to knowing what was going on in your life, from daily activities to future plans. Now, they get nothing. And that absence can feel jarring.

Forcing Them to Miss Your Intimacy

Regardless of why they ended the relationship, if it lasted six months or more, your ex will inevitably miss the intimacy you shared. That’s the part of a relationship people tend to miss the most. Even in shorter relationships, there is a level of connection that gets disrupted when one person disappears.

Many times, after a breakup, an ex will check social media, scroll through old pictures, or casually ask mutual friends about you. This gives them a sense of staying emotionally connected, even if the relationship has ended. But when you enforce radio silence, they lose that option.

If all they can see are old posts and outdated pictures, it doesn't satisfy them. They want new information—something to confirm that you’re still there, still missing them, still possibly open to reconciliation. But when you disappear, they feel the full impact of what it means to no longer have you in their life.

Creating a Psychological Void

The mind has a tendency to fixate on what it cannot have. When you go silent, your ex is left with questions:

• How are you feeling about the breakup?
• Are you moving on?
• Have you met someone new?

That curiosity is crucial. If they assume they can check in on you whenever they want, they feel in control. But when that information is no longer available, their curiosity can quickly turn into concern, then regret.

People often think that their ex expects them to beg, plead, or try to convince them to stay. When you do the opposite—when you vanish—they don’t know what to think. It’s unexpected, and that makes it powerful.

Preventing Closure

Get Coach Lee's Reunion Blueprint to get your ex back for only $7 at https://ReunionBlueprint.com. 

Many times, an ex will look for ways to feel justified in their decision. They want closure on their terms. If they see you struggling, reaching out, or making it clear that you still want them, it gives them a sense of relief. They feel that breaking up was the right choice.

But when they can’t see any evidence of your emotions, they are left in a state of uncertainty. They don’t know if you’re heartbroken or if you’ve already moved on. That lack of closure leaves the door open for them to second-guess their decision.

Triggering Fear of Missing Out (FOMO)

People don’t like the idea of being left out. If your ex believes they still have a place in your life, even from a distance, they won’t feel a strong urge to return.

But when you go silent, their mind starts to assume things:

• You must be out having fun.
• You must be doing things they don’t know about.
• Maybe you’ve already found someone new.

These thoughts create a fear of missing out—on your life, your happiness, and possibly even a reconciliation.

Making Yourself Inaccessible

There’s a big difference between knowing you can reach someone and realizing you might not be able to. Radio silence creates the illusion that you are out of reach. Even if your ex technically could contact you, they hesitate.

Why? Because they don’t know how you’ll respond—or if you’ll respond at all. And when people feel they can’t have something, they often want it more.

Creating a Phantom Relationship

Over time, your ex may find themselves mentally engaging with you even though you’re not around. They will replay memories, imagine conversations, and try to recreate the intimacy they lost.

At first, this might feel satisfying to them. But it doesn’t take long for them to realize that reminiscing is not the same as actually having you in their life. That realization can lead them to question the breakup.

The Power of Absence

When done correctly, radio silence makes your ex wonder about you constantly. It creates an emotional gap that only you can fill. And the longer they go without answers, the more their mind works against them.

They might start to feel regret. They might worry they’ve lost you for good. And in some cases, they may even become obsessed with the idea of getting you back.

But none of that can happen if you’re constantly reminding them you’re still there. That’s why silence is so powerful—it forces them to feel the weight of the breakup.

So if you’re wondering what to do after a breakup, consider this: Sometimes, the best thing you can do is nothing at all.

Let them feel your absence. Let them wonder. Let them regret.

And if they truly care, they will come looking for you. Get Coach Lee's Reunion Blueprint to get your ex back for only $7 at https://ReunionBlueprint.com.

Original article entitled, "Radio Silence to Get Your Ex Back" at https://myexbackcoach.com/radio-silence/

No Contact For Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)

Does No Contact Work with a Borderline Personality Disorder Ex?

Breaking up with someone who has Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) presents unique challenges, leading many to question whether the no-contact rule is effective in this situation.

In this audio/video, Coach Lee explores how no contact impacts individuals with BPD, the reactions you might encounter, and whether this approach fosters healing, clarity, and even reconciliation.

What You’ll Discover in This Video:

Why No Contact Works Differently with a BPD Ex: How emotional instability and extreme mood swings influence their perception of separation.

Understanding the Push-Pull Cycle: Why individuals with BPD shift between craving closeness and abruptly pushing you away—and how no contact disrupts this pattern.

Common Emotional Reactions to No Contact: Anticipating responses like distress, idealization, or even manipulative attempts to draw you back in.

Dangers of Breaking No Contact Prematurely: How engaging too soon can trap you in an unhealthy cycle and prevent both of you from truly moving forward.

How No Contact Promotes Growth for Both of You: Why distancing yourself isn’t about punishment but about allowing space for emotional reset and perspective shifts.

Many assume that maintaining no contact with a BPD ex is impossible due to their intense emotional reactions, but this video sheds light on why it can be one of the most crucial steps toward personal healing and establishing better relationship dynamics in the future.

What Is BPD?
Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is a mental health condition characterized by extreme emotional fluctuations, difficulty regulating emotions, and unstable relationships. Those with BPD often struggle with fear of abandonment, intense mood swings, and behaviors that may come across as manipulative or erratic. Partners of individuals with BPD frequently describe the relationship as feeling like they are "walking on eggshells."

Helpful Resources:
📌 Get the $7 Reunion Blueprint for a step-by-step guide to getting your ex back: ReunionBlueprint.com
📌 Visit MyExBackCoach.com for more advice on breakups, emotional healing, and relationship strategies.

💬 Join the discussion! Have you implemented no contact with a BPD ex? What was your experience? Drop a comment below, and don’t forget to like, subscribe, and turn on notifications for more expert relationship guidance from Coach Lee.

🔔 Watch now and gain the insight you need to navigate this challenging situation. Read the accompanying article: No Contact and Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)

Your Ex Misses You LATER

Why Your Ex Misses You Later (And What You Can Do About It)

Get Coach Lee's Reunion Blueprint to get your ex back!

After a breakup, you may find yourself missing your ex almost immediately, but they often take longer to feel that same sense of loss. This delay happens for a reason, and understanding why can help you handle the situation in a way that increases your chances of getting them back. Here’s what happens in your ex’s mind after a breakup and what you can do about it.

1. The Delayed Loss Window
Your ex likely experiences something called the delayed loss window. Immediately after breaking up with you, they feel a sense of relief. Ending a relationship, even one they wanted to end, is difficult. They may have dreaded the conversation, felt guilty about hurting you, or worried about the awkwardness of the situation. Once the breakup is over, they experience emotional relief—similar to the way you feel after completing a difficult task.

During this stage, your ex believes life will be better without you. They assume they’re moving toward something better, whether that means another person, more freedom, or simply avoiding problems they perceived in the relationship. However, this relief is temporary.

What You Should Do
The best way to move them out of this relief stage quickly is no contact. This means no texting, calling, or watching their social media stories. You must remove yourself from their life entirely. By doing so, you prevent them from constantly reaffirming their decision. If you stay in contact, they will continue seeking relief from the breakup, reinforcing the idea that breaking up was the right choice. But when you disappear, the relief stage ends much faster.

2. From Freedom to Loneliness
After the relief stage, reality begins to set in. Even if your ex has started dating someone else, they still experience loneliness—not just in the sense of missing your presence, but in terms of emotional intimacy.

Emotional intimacy develops when two people share their lives, thoughts, and feelings over time. It’s not something they can easily replace. When they no longer have you to talk to about their day, their past, and their feelings, a void appears. Even if they are surrounded by other people, the loneliness from losing that deep connection with you starts to take hold.

What You Should Do
Again, no contact is key. Their loneliness will intensify when they realize they can’t turn to you for comfort. If you reach out, you provide an easy escape from this loneliness, and they don’t have to face the consequences of their decision. But if you remain silent, they will begin to miss the emotional connection they lost.

Get Coach Lee's Reunion Blueprint to get your ex back!

3. The Emotional Echo Effect
As time passes, your ex will start experiencing emotional echoes—waves of sadness, longing, and nostalgia. These moments are triggered by things like hearing a song that reminds them of you, seeing a picture of the two of you, or even catching a familiar scent.

When you are silent, these emotional echoes become stronger because they assume you’re happily moving on. If you were reaching out, they’d feel reassured that you were still available. But since they don’t hear from you, doubt begins to creep in.

What You Should Do
Maintain mystery and silence. When they don’t know what you’re up to, their imagination takes over, and they may start to worry that you are moving on. This uncertainty makes them reevaluate the breakup.

4. Unexpected Jealousy
Jealousy is a powerful emotion, but it must happen naturally. If you post pictures with someone new to make your ex jealous, they will likely see through it and feel reassured that you still care. However, if they simply suspect you are moving on, the jealousy is much stronger because they believe it’s real.

What You Should Do
Instead of trying to make them jealous, stay silent and live your life. Let them wonder. Their mind will fill in the blanks, making them fear they lost you for good.

5. Their Brain Rewrites the Breakup
At first, your ex will try to justify the breakup by telling themselves, “It was for the best.” But as time passes, they begin to question whether they made the right choice. When they don’t hear from you, they feel less defensive about the breakup and start remembering the good times more than the bad.

This is because time changes perception. If you remain silent, your ex’s brain begins to rewrite history, making them nostalgic for the relationship.

What You Should Do
Resist the urge to remind them of the past. Let time do the work. If they reach out, it’s because their own mind has convinced them that they may have made a mistake.

Final Thoughts
The key to making your ex miss you is simple: silence, patience, and self-respect. Let them go through their process without interference. If they truly cared about you, they will eventually feel the weight of their decision. At that point, the door will be open for reconciliation—but only if you have given them the space to realize what they lost.

Get Coach Lee's Reunion Blueprint to get your ex back!

Move On To Get Your Ex Back?

One of the most surprising ways to get your ex back is to genuinely move on. It sounds counterintuitive, but detaching from the relationship and focusing on your own growth can actually make your ex reconsider their decision. In this video, Coach Lee explains why shifting your mindset away from desperation and toward self-improvement increases your attractiveness and draws your ex back toward you.

Get Coach Lee's "Reunion Blueprint" to get your ex back! https://ReunionBlueprint.com  

Why Moving On is So Powerful

When someone breaks up with you, they expect you to chase them or to be emotionally devastated. But when you take a step back, embrace life, and stop trying to convince them to return, it changes their perception of you. Your ex starts to wonder if they made the right decision, and the emotional distance allows them to miss you.

Coach Lee breaks down the psychological principles behind this shift, including:

• Reverse Psychology in Attraction: How becoming less available increases your value in their eyes.

• Scarcity and Intrigue: Why your absence can make them think about you more.

• Emotional Reset: How giving them space allows both of you to view the relationship more clearly.

How to Move On Effectively

Moving on doesn’t mean pretending to be happy just to get a reaction. It means truly investing in yourself and your future. Here’s how you can do that:

1. Build Your Confidence: Start prioritizing self-care, fitness, and personal development to enhance your self-esteem.

2. Engage in New Activities: Find new hobbies or revisit passions that may have been neglected during the relationship.

3. Be Social and Expand Your Network: Spending time with friends and making new connections shows that you are thriving.

4. Practice No Contact: Stop reaching out, stop checking their social media, and allow them to feel your absence.

What Happens Next?

When your ex sees that you’re not chasing them, it creates an internal struggle. They start wondering why you’re doing fine without them and whether they made the right decision. This doubt can cause them to reach out or show renewed interest.

Whether or not reconciliation happens, focusing on moving forward puts you in a strong position emotionally. You’re no longer relying on their return to feel happy and complete, and ironically, that’s what makes you more attractive in their eyes.

Watch this video to learn more about how detaching from your ex can actually bring them back into your life. And if you want step-by-step guidance on how to navigate this process, visit https://ReunionBlueprint.com 

Video mentioned: Stages Your Ex Goes Through In No Contact https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wYEAWNvtaTk